Saturday, September 13, 2014

Hope for the future

It's been since April or May since the last schizophrenic episode. It's getting easier to not fear the worst when I have flash backs of past events. A distant cousin told me of her nephew that has schizophrenia. She said that he is married and occasionally has anger issues when he doesn't take his medicine. I pray that my son can lead a "normal" life with a wife and children. He has not been aggressive since he was regulated on 40 mg of Latuda. He's doing well on the medicine and for now he's taking it without complaint.

The last few weeks we've had several trials (which don't come close to the stress schizophrenia can cause). First Paul had a car accident that landed us in the emergency room with fear he had a concussion. Just a few days later he was riding his bike and flipped over the handle bars of the bike. He hurt his hand and wrist. Our daughter has been complaining for months about her bed so we bought her a new bed. In the meantime, the TV went out and we bought a new one which meant we also had to buy a TV stand. Jacob complained about a toothache and the dentist told us he had an infection and needed a root canal. He got the root canal and is taking antibiotics for the infection. It's been a week and he still complains of pain. Hopefully that will end soon. THEN I came home to melted ice around the refrigerator. A repairman charged us $78 to tell us the compressor was out and we needed a new refrigerator. Our bank account is dry!

Again, this doesn't compare with the stress of mental illness. On medicine we are not dealing with anger, delusions, confused speech, or voices. He does have depression which leaves him talking little, sleeping a lot and staying in his room. I am always elated when he smiles, laughs or helps around the house. It's amazing how your expectations can change. He use to do chores everyday now once a week if he empties the dishwasher I am happy.

We are at a better place and pray he continues with his medicine and that I can stop analyzing his mood all the time. I haven't cried in months which I take as a good sign. It means I have hope for the future.

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