We've been on a roller coaster trying to get the right medication for my depression and anxiety and to control the voices, delusions, paranoia, and anger for my son. My son is diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. We will have many "good" months then he will overdose on drugs, go off of his prescription medications or the medications will simply stop working. This website began to try to sort out what was going on with our son. It has continued as I journal on topics sporadically.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Let me rest in your holiness
I found a blog by Robin Lee Hatcher where she says this within a poem. Right now meditating in God's holiness sounds so refreshing. May I bless others with the rest I receive from God's holiness.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Jacob
Jacob will be 14 on the 20th. I have watched him grow and had so many precious moments.
He is a strong, philosophical guy and I can never guess what he is thinking. He always has me puzzled. I think I am the luckiest mother for the opportunity to learn about him.
Jacob has always loved strong movement--swings, climbing, exploring. Now at 14 he skateboards, jumps on the trampoline with his dog and is exercising all the time.
Jacob has lots of good friends. He has never been the person to collect as many friends as possible but instead find someone and know them forever. His best friend, Logan, now lives a state away but Jacob would never turn his back on him.
Happy Birthday, Jacob. I love you very much.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Usefulness
When I was in 5th grade Nettie Green told us that God always gives our life purpose, and it is our responsibility to find it. I remember her example was a mother with a 2 year old that God gave the mother to wipe his nose. That stuck with me, because it isn't always the glamour or power that is our purpose.
I sometimes have check list to make sure that I get the things completed that I need to complete but my purpose in life is completed without being on the list. I wake to pray first thing, I bring Paul coffee, I tell my children that I love them, I check in with friends. I never end a day without thinking through to make sure that good was done.
As a teacher, I feel I have a job that can heal others or hurt others. Many times my purpose is putting on a band-aid, giving a hug or teaching how to get along with others.
Yes, I feel useful. Thank you Nettie Green for a message that has stuck with me through decades.
I sometimes have check list to make sure that I get the things completed that I need to complete but my purpose in life is completed without being on the list. I wake to pray first thing, I bring Paul coffee, I tell my children that I love them, I check in with friends. I never end a day without thinking through to make sure that good was done.
As a teacher, I feel I have a job that can heal others or hurt others. Many times my purpose is putting on a band-aid, giving a hug or teaching how to get along with others.
Yes, I feel useful. Thank you Nettie Green for a message that has stuck with me through decades.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Blessings
Look back and thank God. Look forward and trust God. Look around and serve God. Look within and find God! God closes doors no man can open and God opens doors no man can close.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Paul
I grew up in the same town as Paul. I never thought of him as more than someone that I went to school and church with, but the older ladies of our town would tell us there was something more there.
In highschool, I was a freshman and he was a junior and he would have me carry his things, duck walk, and other things that I know now was his way of spending time with me. He was always the jokester.
When Paul joined the Air Force I realized I missed his smiling face. We dated when he visited our small town, but soon I was driving to see him. Later we were married, now 3 children later, I still laugh at his silly actions. He is someone I admire. He is smart, funny and can handle what life gives him. We have been married 25 years and I love him more today.
In highschool, I was a freshman and he was a junior and he would have me carry his things, duck walk, and other things that I know now was his way of spending time with me. He was always the jokester.
When Paul joined the Air Force I realized I missed his smiling face. We dated when he visited our small town, but soon I was driving to see him. Later we were married, now 3 children later, I still laugh at his silly actions. He is someone I admire. He is smart, funny and can handle what life gives him. We have been married 25 years and I love him more today.
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