Violence and Schizophrenia

In October 2015 we had a horrible incident where my son was hearing voices and attacked my husband. My daughter had several friends over, I went to bed and about 2 a.m. I heard screaming. I pulled my son off my husband and my husband went to the ER. He had several bruises but was otherwise okay. I went to church the next morning because you just power through. I don't know where the extra strength comes from when you are in trials like this.

This weekend, almost a year after this incident, my oldest son had friends over. I went to bed and started having flashback of the previous incident. I kept worrying that my younger son was going to go psychotic. Nothing happened. My youngest son is doing well right now. I eventually went to sleep. No one has ever diagnosed me with PTSD but I think I have some symptoms of it.

2016 has been relatively calm. My younger son has had a few incidents of voices but no screaming, or violence. We live in fear from what we've gone through. We don't know when it will return.

Riding the wave of joy and anxiety

I found my joy again! I don't know how or why but I am happy all the time. I'm not saying I don't get anxious but life is happy. My son hasn't cut in months and seems stable. We recently went on vacation to the river and had a great time.

We walked trails, went swimming and cooked on the grill. My son smiled and laughed the whole vacation. It was so refreshing. We had one episode of him dropping a glass pipe and breaking it and he cried. They was the only "abnormal" thing that happened on the trip. We ate out at Applebees which is hard for his vegetarian diet. We went to Wal-Mart and he played the arcade games. Just happy times.

I hope this normalcy can last. We'd like to go on cruise next year. Schizophrenia is so unfriendly. You never know when the voices and demons will return. I don't know when he will become hostile or angry.

Life is precarious.